The 7 Adventures of Sinbad

JUST HAVE TWO TODDLERS RUN AROUND KICKING A BALL AND YOU WILL BE MORE ENTERTAINED. My Rating: O Stars - Are You Kidding Me?

You know, I used to think movies weren't gonna get worse than "World's Greatest Dad". This broke that scale. There's a reason no one's heard of Asylum Studios. They make, simply put, amateur movies. That probably comes from the company's lack of money. But here's the thing: if you don't have the money, don't make a movie depending entirely on special effects! Make a drama or something. I mean really, just watch the previews for other Asylum films like "Mega Piranha" or "Meteor Apocalypse". They look so cheesy. Just like this film. The plot is short and simple: An industrialist must complete 7 impossible tasks to stop the apocalypse...CHEESY. I've seen old movies with many cheesy things that still topped this by measures that no person can fathom. 'Nuff said about the plot line. I would say "don't even get me started on the special effects", but then what's the point of reviewing it? But, to sum it all up, the effects are pure garbage. "Power Rangers" has done better than that. You can tell that creatures are CG. Just imagine a live-action movie that had a character from, say, "TMNT" standing next to the LIVE action characters. That's what it looked like. On top of that, you can tell the actors were staring at nothing. So yes, poor acting. But they were buried in a terrible plot line and poorly written script. Every event of the film is jumbled and random. I honestly think that "Sesame Street" makes more sense. Asylum just need to avoid special effects. If they are to become a major film company, which they clearly are trying to do, they need to make good movies. If they make good movies, they get more money, THEN they use special effects that look decent. But stick to some other genre for now because clearly this isn't getting them very far. There really isn't much else to talk about for a movie this terrible. It's not layered. Everything about the film is worn right out on it's sleeves. That leaves me with not much to talk about. It's so bad it hurts. Overall, bad acting because it really just wasn't believable for me;they need a GRIPPING performance, TERRIBLE special effects and plot definitely killed it, and just an awful experience. The thing I can say about this is: The film is an absolute must NOT see.

Starring: Patrick Muldoon Directors: Adam Silver
Bo Svenson Ben Hayflick