Alice in Wonderland

C'MON MR. BURTON! YOU KNOW BETTER THAN THAT! My Rating: * - Terrible

Tim Burton seems to have lost his movie-making touch with his new film "Alice in Wonderland". The previews (if you thought even those were good) don't even describe the movie in the least bit because it's a lot worse. Mr. Burton obviously knew what he was doing with the special affects and how he wanted the actors to act but the rest is completely thumbs down. The movie has somewhat of a slow beginning yet it's not bad but from the time she arrives in Wonderland it quickly gets worse, and worse, and, well, a lot worse. Some things in the movie are just plain Gothic and gross. If parents take their kids to this movie and they are surprised that this "innocent" little film has heads floating in a moat or eye balls being stabbed out, I wouldn't be surprised that they were surprised. That makes you just not want to keep watching film. They have almost no comedy in this but when they do, it's pointless. Someone warming their feet on a pig belly isn't even that funny and the funniest thing in the film is a smoking caterpillar and he doesn't even make jokes. The acting is great and you can't expect much less from big stars like Johnny Deep(The Mad Hatter) and Anne Hathaway(The White Queen) but the movie itself just doesn't even pass for "Okay". The biggest mistake made is trying to have the actors and special affects run the entire thing but one thing you can learn by watching this movie is, sadly, that that's not enough to power the engine. The plot has been done in a cartoon movie also by Disney that is this same thing so if you've seen it, you know it's about a girl named Alice who falls down a hole and ends up in a magical place called Wonderland where strange creatures live and the land has been taken over by a queen who is oddly obsessed with the color red and has this gigantic head which is ironic because she (as portrayed in the film) is also obsessed with decapitation. Another bad thing is that even though it's a fantasy movie, it still lacks logic that most fantasy movies and even books keep. Like for instance, say this was Narnia and you fell down a hole that stretched equal to a thousand stories from ground level to the bottom, wouldn't you die if not at least be seriously injured? Well, in this, Alice doesn't even get a scratch but instead she hits the ground and just gets back up like nothing happened. Yet somehow later in the film she is able to get a nasty cut after being scratched by a giant beast. The film also can be very graphic and shouldn't even pass as a kid's film and will leave you surprised at Disney but not so much at Tim Burton with this very (as you probably have guessed by the previews) weird movie. Overall, the movie has good acting and great special affects that could even compete with "Avatar" but everything else is shockingly bad and the movie isn't much of a wonderland itself.

Starring: Mia Wasikowska Director: Linda Woolverton
Johnny Depp
Anne Hathaway
Crispin Glover
Matt Lucas